A week back, the dance unit started at school. I saw it coming, like that feeling when you know you have to take out the trash. Despised upon, I just wanted to get it over with. And I know some of you might be thinking “dance? whats wrong with dance?” and here’s what I have to tell you. It ain’t no hip hop. ITS SQUARE DANCING. Y’know, “Yeehaw! swing yer partner round ‘n’ round”.
So the girls are on one side of the gym, and the boys are on the other side. We’re all lined up and when the teachers turn on the music, the first person in line is supposed to walk to the center and the guy is supposed to ‘reach out his hand’. Then the next person in line goes etc… Like, do you get the picture?? its weird because the guys are all counting to see which girl they get (LOL) and I’m just trying not to make eye contact.
Oh and when they take your hand, there’s always three types of guys:
1) The “I’m scared of Ebola” dude
2) ‘The sweaty’ dude
3) ‘The Earthquake magnitude of 9.9’ dude
Basically, the “I’m scared of Ebola” dude has his sweater sleeves covering his entire hand and when you try to hold hands its weird because its like holding a piece of living cloth??
Then the “sweaty” dude is like overly nervous or he just has incredibly flowing sweat glands. Yep. That must be it.
And lastly, the “Earthquake magnitude of 9.9” dude. He’s just either drank ten cans of Red Bull topped with Pixie Sticks, or he’s just overly joyed to be authorized to touch a girls hand.. (in his mind “FOR THE FIRST TIME IN FOREVERR”) omg.
Okay yea I’m done. Comment below if you had to do square dancing at school!